last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
