oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
