I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
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