You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
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