Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
