also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
