Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Randomize
