I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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