I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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