how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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