i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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