So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize