youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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