Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
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