I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
i may or may not be watching the land before time
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
