Christians are straight up FREAKS
nutella sex= disaster
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
