it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
