oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize
