at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
