i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize
