Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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