I must be too annoying 4 u.
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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