Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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