I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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