But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize