Grow some girl-balls and come out already
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
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