I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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