Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
