I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
