PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
