i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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