Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
