If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
