Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
only you would photoshop your dick
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
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