Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
