I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
