All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize