4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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