i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
