i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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