butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
