Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Randomize
