well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
as a side note pls kill me
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
