All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
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