No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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