And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
