its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
