yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Randomize
