i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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