all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
